Listening to Teen IS VERY IMPORTANT!!!

From Pastor Dennis Gray

Good communication with teens, as with anyone, is to listen carefully to what they say. Also, involved is noticing non-verbal communicating or body language. Maybe this later is as important.

Families often do not know how to communicate. Why is this? Maybe it is fear. Could be anger. Maybe the teen has been disciplined harshly and is afraid of this happening again. It could be depression or anxiety. Other factors could be invovled.

Active listening also involves being reflective. This means to repeat what a person is saying in ones own words so that we can check to see if we have understood correctly. We do this in counseling and we can do this when listening.

Research teaches us that a number of teens are lonely or do not feel part of their families. Families are often very busy and do not realize that their children are as lonely as they maybe are.

Families attend sports events etc and their children go on a bus and they go by car. No communication. This goes for quite a number of activies.

Some one has once concluded that parents do not communicate "real teaching" to their children more than just a few seconds a day, like 60 seconds. There is a need for real teaching to be done.

Families need to plan to spend time together. Quality time and even longer periods of time together. Things need to be slowed down.

Teens want to be listened to and they like dialog and discussion. They also want parental input. Reasoning with them and teaching God given principles are what is needed. Youth Director? Parent? Teacher? Pastor? Get to listening!